1 Samuel 15:22,23
Ouch! I don't know about you, but the above verse has some difficult words in it. As one who desires to follow the Lord's lead and to obey Him, I am sadly aware of the times I balk when He calls me to do something. The thought that my rebellion is the same sin as witchcraft and my stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry, cuts deeply.
As I was thinking about what to title this piece, two titles came to mind. The one in the title and the other "Don't be slow when God says Go!" They are reminders to me of the necessity of obeying God every time, no matter what He asks of me to do. I have had to repent and apologize numerous times for lagging in obedience. I don't think I'm being disobedient when I dawdle, but I am, and in truth, it shows a tremendous lack of trust in confidence in God's leading. I have recognized there are far too many times when the Lord calls me to do something that I am reluctant in my response. It's not that I don't do as He asks, but I fail to respond quickly to Him, dragging my feet and (sadly) whining a bit about what He wants me to do. Of course, as the gentle, loving Father that He is, He allows me to throw my little tantrum, but then gently disciplines me after I'm done, even blessing me in spite of my behavior.
Recently I was reluctant to attend a meeting with my husband, not wanting to leave my "comfort zone". I like being somewhat of a hermit and not having to interact with people, especially when I'm feeling tired and a bit stretched. I knew my excuse was feeble though, and attended the meeting with my husband. For the better part of the evening I did my "duty" as his supportive spouse, but had little confidence I was there for anything other than that. But then, God being God, and loving and using us in spite of our negative attitudes, put someone in front of me who needed a word of comfort. Immediately stricken by my selfish, self-serving attitude, I shot a prayer heavenward asking for forgiveness and the right words to minister to the hurting soul who wept before me. Encouraging her and praying with her, I knew I was there for a purpose.
As we left the meeting the joy and conviction I felt was overwhelming. I couldn't help but wonder how many opportunities I've missed because of my stubborn and rebellious spirit. It caused me to look deeper into the places where I lag in obedience out of selfishness or lack of trust. It humbles me again before my gracious Lord, knowing how much He sacrificed for me, and makes me even more determined to correct my behavior.
So, as I hear Him tell me the things He wants me to do today, I do them as quickly as possible, trusting Him for the out come. After all, it's not about ME. It's always about serving Him, and every time I do, I am blessed above and beyond what I can think or ask.
I pray you will find the joy of His grace in serving Him as well. May He always receive the glory.
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